GENT …has been trapped in purgatory for around 200 years. That’s a long time to be in one place doing the same things, with the same people and having the same BARTENDER spit in the SAME DRINK, GARY! Doesn’t matter, he’s sane. He hasn’t lost. Nah, he never HAD it. He’s a crap haunter, can’t haunt someone to save his death. He’s going through hell, living in purgatory, he can’t even paint, which was what he tried to do on earth all those years ago. When Iggy comes along, well, there might just be a way out of this place after all.


IGGY …was top of the food chain, she made sure of it. People gonna get the best of her? Nah. She’ll get the best of them. Part of the reason why she pranks for likes on YouTube. Because she’s a jerk. And proud of it, Bluto! Why you so interested in her anyway? Isn’t that kind of creepy? Maybe it’s because she was a turkey baster baby that never knew her father, or maybe it was because she was almost gonna meet her dad when she was… well, put up in the purgatory hotel. Or maybe, just maybe, it’s because she’s forming some sort of conscience… Ha! Who would want that?


TROG …is caveman. He take care of hotel. He no like scaring people. So he been here long time. Everything fine. Everything okay. But Anna great. Anna more bright than fire. Anna just as scary. Sigh.  


GARY …is the chipperest mailman you ever had! He’ll fix you up a cocktail too if you find yourself at the bar. Just watch out, he’ll spit in it. No joke! He takes every job pretty seriously, and has for over 50 years. Has he cracked? Sure! He’s certifiable! Once you get reality out of the way, you can have a little fun!


ANNA …isn’t one of those dumb Dora’s, flashing their stockings for a giggle, no, being a flapper is a way life, honey. It’s the cat’s meow and it’s pajamas. If coming to purgatory hotel is some sort of punishment for her heckling the other dancers back on Earth, well, it was worth it, ya see? Because she’s made a little home for herself here, she’s the cock of the walk, haunting for fun but never to leave. Why leave the place that makes you feel most yourself in all the world? She wouldn’t. She ain’t no dumb Dora.


DORSEY …is a paranormal investigator, not an exorcist, for heaven’s sake! See he doesn’t want to banish them from his house, no, no, no, he wants to invite them in. Why? WHY!? Because then he might have a chance at actually proving to the disrespectful so-called scientific community that ghosts are as real as you and me. After losing his parents to some haunters as a kid, he needs to prove it, prove that he’s not crazy, and he’ll give anything to do so.


PENNY …used to be a mild mannered workaholic, fed her cats and drank 6 glasses of water a day. That’s what you’re supposed to do, right? That is, until Iggy pranks her, and shows her what a nobody she is. Like, she didn’t even have like a hundred followers before Iggy told her what life was really about: your image! Then Iggy goes and dies and Penny has the perfect platform: IggysLastVictim is what Penny was and it’s what she’ll be. Now she has “friends” online, “followers” in her phone, and every picture has her pursed lips. K bai.


PETER …is Iggy’s biological father. He’s been a good man throughout his whole life. He made sure of it. Went slow to not make mistakes. Never cut corners. Then, when he was hard up for cash, he donated sperm. No biggie. He didn’t expect his kids to track him, he didn’t expect Iggy. But, golly, what a good gosh darn surprise!